Ye Olde Journal

You'll have to excuse all the nihilism today. It's all from a good place, I'm sure.


I purchased sixty dollars worth of clothing today. From Target. Since leaving the store I've experienced mild nausea and a bit of a headache.

In all seriousness, shopping feels like public masturbation to me.


Hm. I wonder if posting this before my last entry would have been more or slightly less hypocritical of me. You be the judge.

I have not seen my roommate at all this week, he doesn't respond to my texts, and I'm pretty sure he knows what we need to talk about. I'm not mad at him and I don't assume he's purposely ignoring me (though I don't know for sure), but I want him to come home and help his apartment-mates make a decision. It would be considerate.

Excuse all the pronouns. I'm talking about Kevin Colorado.


In other confessional rantings...

...the former fourth member of our apartment family (yes, we are a family) left at the end of last month. He gave us practically no notice before he left. I mean, literally, he wrote a cryptic note on the whiteboard and split.

My mom, the person who actually writes the check, just got screwed out of almost four hundred dollars because someone (I'll use an indefinite here) chose to tell me false plans of: staying with as the fourth roommate, getting a second job to make ends meet, and appealing to his parents to help out. See, this I AM mad about. No only mad; I feel cheated.

If he really had problems with situations at the apartment (which I know he did because he confided in me many times about it), he should have told me he didn't want to stay. And even if the situation to him felt so bad he should need to leave as soon as possible, he still should have told one of us to our faces. His decision has put a lot of pressure on everyone in the apartment. It was irresponsible and dishonest, just like me using livejournal as a confession against the anonymous who are really not that anonymous. Especially when it's not them who will read this, but their friends.


(It's entirely for the purpose of my own self-confession and self-empowering, I wholly admit it)


But I will confront about it. I tried before and I don't think he understood my frustration with him. I'll make it succinct next time.


Yes. Stress and paranoia is a factor in this post. But I feel better having spoken...typed...my mind.

Kevin needs to:

1. Finish the rest of his spring break homework

2. Get applications for a full-time summer job

3. Take a look at apartments in Livermore with Kevin Colorado

4. Ensure that I can fit a work schedule around a Los Positas class or two


I would like to work with small children or perhaps at the Tennis Club. And then I have to get a lease for a place in San Francisco.


Wish me luck.

Yes, Dammit.

My friend Eric hosts a radioshow. You should all check it out.

His air time is:

Tuesday, 9:00 - 10:00
Friday, 9:00 - 10:00
Saturday, 5:00 - 6:00

You scored as Anarchism. <'Imunimaginative's Deviantart Page'> </td> Anarchism 100% Socialist 67% Green 67% Communism 58% Democrat 50% Republican 33% Fascism 8% Nazi 0% What Political Party Do Your Beliefs Put You In? created with QuizFarm.com

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to the First Level of Hell - Limbo!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	High
Level 2 (Lustful)	Low
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Moderate
Level 7 (Violent)	Moderate
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Moderate
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Moderate

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

"They're living in the tropics. They're well fed. They've got everything they could possibly want."
~ Dicky Cheney to a CNN interviewer on the detainees in Guantanamo Bay

I am so hungry...

Seriously, my grandparent's house does not have enough food to properly nourish a teen-aged boy. My dinner last night came out of a peanut butter jar. There wasn't much in the jar either. I've had a cup of tea today and I'm feeling a little malnourished. My mother is taking me to the store to buy some food for the house soon.

So mostly I've been watching television so far since I have access to IFC and FSTV. I've also been reading but not so much as I forgot to bring interesting books. I think I'll get some homework done while I'm up here as well.

Hey...Pizza for dinner tonight.

I was looking through my CD holder for some music to upload to my grandpa's iTunes library and I discovered a CD that I didn't know I had. It's Into The Labyrinth by Dead Can Dance. I was quite surprised when I found it. It's a pretty good CD despite being called one of their "disappointments." I don't remember buying it but hey, why complain? Seriously though, if it's any of yours, let me know and I'll gladly return it.

OK...food felt good. I just found something to eat and I'm feeling better...

Our bodies are composed of completely different molecules than they were a few years ago because of cell regeneration. If our cells regenerate and are constantly turning over and such, then how is it possible for us to retain our memory, personality, and character traits?

I've decided to adapt to a vegetarian diet. The reasons are mainly health concerned and my distaste for meat which has been present for some time. Don't worry, I'm not going to kill myself. I'm well aware of what I'm doing and I've already done the research into how to implement such a diet without denying your body of protein, iron, calcium, and vitamin B₁₂. Oh, and never fear for I'll never EVER become a militant vegetarian fascist who pushes his beliefs on others. I have no beef
(no pun intended) with anyone who eats meat as long as they don't ridicule my choice.

Now that that's been taken care of, on to other matters...

I really should get started on my History homework. Oi Gevalt! The teacher seems to be a bit uptight. It seems to be a trend amongst honors and AP History teachers at Granada.

I have a birthday present for a certain someone who probably already knows what he's getting.

Hm...I think I'll go and read now. Good night and good health.

Things you enjoy, not because you have to but because you WANT to, even when no one around you wants to go out and play. What lowers your stress/blood pressure/anxiety level? Make a list, post it to your journal... and then tag 5 friends and ask them to post it to theirs:

(In no particular order)

1.) Listening to good music
2.) Watching good films
3.) Researching on various topics of interest
4.) Exercise
5.) Reading
6.) Philosophy
7.) Learning uncommon knowledge
8.) Sleep
9) Insomnia
10) Good Company
11) Solitude
12) Remembering that when I die my brain will be alive for about six to twelve minutes

I tag...Daniel, Kerry, Aubrey, Kasey, and Rachel. Wow. Good thing there exactly five friends on my friends list that actually update.

Hello children of all shapes, sizes, and colors. School is out!

Now that the second level of high school indoctrination is over, perhaps I can get back to reading like I used to. Of course I'm definitely free to hang out and contemplate every aspect of whatever with all whomever wishes for me to grace their presence (I kid). However, I'm also going to be weighted down with a bit of Summer homework. Even with Summer homework, I want to make sure I spend time with people. Call me if you ever want me.

449-7020

Today I'm going to Kevin's (Colorado) house to watch movies and meet some of his friends. We might actually make a movie, it being that his he and his friends are big film lovers. Lets see how this goes...

Ricky returned my pants. I had left them in the back of his Expedition after we went shopping yesterday. He came by while I was at Jenny's graduation and threw them into my garage. Good job Ricky and thanks.

HAPPY GRADUATION JENNY! + HAPPY PROMOTION KERRY!

I'm very proud of them both and especially Kerry for winning the Heather Rice Reading Award.

The Biology and Math finals weren't as hard as I had expected them to be. I'm just glad that they're over as they were quite long and ever so tedious.

I wonder if Xian and Fan are up for shopping tomorrow. They seemed like they were interested in going.

Tomorrow at six is Kerry's promotion. If you want to come to support my sister, give me a call or IM me so we'll know to get you.

The day after tomorrow is Jenny's graduation. We get special seats because my grandma is wheel-chair bound.


Mom: I can't wait to take Grandma to Disney Land so I can use her to jump to the head of the line at the rides.

Kevin: Yeah, that's not senior exploitation...

Mom: Of course not!

I'm not going to fencing tomorrow, obviously, but if you read this Aubrey, be sure to tell Sierra that she'll need to get her own ride there.

"I'm washing the school off my hands..." ~Kristy

I feel strangely content at the moment. I'm not sure why. It just kind of feels right.

It might have been the Chai. Yep, I think it might have been the Chai.

But then again, during Biology I started to daze off and I began to feel like my body was a separate entity from my mind and that I was floating over myself in a transcendent manner. It was really strange and it happened three times during the block and it only lasted for about five seconds each time. Strange things seem to happen during Biology.

OK. I've just been informed that all those times in which I've gone through paralysis while laying down is just a hypnagogic period between sleep and awake and is a step towards lucid dreaming. This should be interesting....

Jarod called me yesterday and apologized for the way he's been acting lately with his girlfriend (actually, soon to be ex). Now, anyone who doesn't like Jarod because he's a "slacker" or think he's "stupid" or anything like that can seriously toss off. I honestly don't care what you have to say about him. Nobody really knows who he is except for a few people (me included) and the truth is that he's really a sensitive guy who is very in-tuned with his emotions and is much more than he seems. Yes, he does not necessarily realize his true academic abilities (which exist, though he chooses not to exhibit them), but he is smarter than people like to say that he is. In the end, I don't care what any stuck up honors student will say about him and he doesn't care what some burned out loser will say about me. And that's true friendship.

Ricky, Jarod, Kevin, and I are walking out to Japiatos for Mexican Food today. Key word: Walking

I wish Ricky wasn't grounded. A driver would be nice...

Wow, Vietnamese food really packs a punch. I had forgotten that. Mom, Kerry and I went out to Pho Hoa out in Pleasanton. It was their first time having Vietnamese food. Needless to say, they didn't enjoy it as much as I did the first time I ever had it (and this time as well). But seriously, once you eat it you feel like going into Rip Van Winkle mode. I slept for over two hours on the couch when I came home (Oh well, so much for running). My muscles feel like they've gone to hell as well. It's probably from sleeping on that couch...


Hey, we don't have to go to school tomorrow. Awesome.

...that our culture is being over burdened with labels? Useless, tactless, labels. They're everywhere these days and there's no escaping it. We apply these labels to almost all aspects of our culture from music to lifestyles and even to concepts such as sexuality which are much better off being defined by action rather than by title. I could go on for a long time about the decline of intellectual civilization because of the rise of the self-righteous asceticism of labels, but for this entry I'll limit myself to the use of labels in terms of music (as this has been subject to some of the most meaningless labels imaginable).

( Click to continue reading... )

Daniel, you strange person. You don't have cancer. Don't stress yourself out.

Doing homework, reading, and listening to the WTF Show. Who could ask for more in this life?


...stafoo!